Tuesday, February 28, 2006

THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY…


Ladies! Ladies! Let him know he’s got your love… look him right in his eyes and tell him…
We’ve been
Too strong for too long (and I can't be without you baby)

And I'll be waiting up until you get home (cuz I can't sleep without you baby)
Anybody who's ever loved, ya know just what I feel
Too hard to fake it, nothing can replace it
Call the radio if you just can't be without your baby

Oh my goodness! I was a fair weather fan of MJB until this album. Not that she ever went away but if I had to define this album in limited terms, I would say this is her “COMEBACK” album. This is by far my favorite Mary album and as you can tell “Be Without You” has gotta be the song of the year (for now) The words just convey, passion, lust, love, the haters, the triumph of love when you allow it to be the one and only underlying factor in all the drama that is the relationship of woman and man.

Chemistry was crazy from the get-go
Neither one of us knew why
We didn't build nothing overnight
Cuz a love like this takes some time

People swore it off as a phase
Said we can't see that
Now from top to bottom
They see that we did that (yes)
It's so true that (yes)
We've been through it (yes)
We got real sh** (yes)
See baby we been...
Too strong…

Most importantly THE TRUTH- which is unconditional love is far from perfect in fact, it’s a sh*t storm but once you make up your mind to be with someone and know in your heart that you truly love them, then all that matters is that person and making sure that it works. Forget what your girls think, forget what the world says or the “If I were you… NEVER! I won’t take that” chorus! DO YOU!

Only u 2 know what you’ve got going on it’s not for the world to decide it’s for you to decide. Everyone always knows what’s good for u, if they know so much why are they not in relationships or why are their relationships just as dysfunctional?
I’ll be the first to say thank God for girlfriends.
However, while it’s great to get the opinion of someone who is outside of your situation, its great to keep in mind that people also have their own baggage and biases which they tend to inadvertently tie into the advice given.

See this is real talk I'ma always stay (no matter what)
Good or bad (thick and thin)
Right or wrong (all day everyday)
Now if you're down on love or don't believe
This ain't for you (no, this ain't for you)
And if you got it deep in your heart
And deep down you know that it's true (come on, come on, come on)
Well, let me see you put your hands up (hands up)
Fellas tell your lady she's the one (fellas tell your lady she's the one, oh)
Put your hands up (hands up)
Ladies let him know he's got your love
Look him right in his eyes and tell him
We've been...
Too strong…

Not all love lasts forever but if it makes you genuinely happy in that moment then I say go for it and revel in that love. Self-love is foremost in loving someone else.

As SJP said in her last monologue of Sex & the city, about relationships, "There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous!"

And if you can’t be without him, swallow that pride, I don’t know about calling the radio but give that man a BUZZ! Let him know he’s got your love!


FOUR WHAT??

My whole entire life has been reduced to FOUR letters. Because of this one four letter word;
W-O-R-K, all I seem to utter now are sentences like “F**K! I can’t believe it’s morning again” “S**T these numbers aren’t balanced AGAIN!! “I CAN’T make it because I have to WORK!” I have BAGS because I LACK sleep. The worst part is; now that NYSC is over, I have to do this 5 days a week. The only good thing in my life that the number 4 symbolized is gone that is my FOUR day work week.

I know now that my dreams in business school of been a highly motivated, up and coming career woman in CORPORATE ….(wherever the hell I live, u fill in the blanks), with my power PRADA HEELS (PRADA always seems to be the footwear of choice in these dreams & real life on TV ;-) and my LV briefcase and let’s not forget the all important POWER, tweed, skirt suit (not that I would be caught dead in tweed or a skirt suit in Lagos) actually I would be dead because if I did wear tweed in Lagos, I would drop dead from heat stroke that is if my very own personal FASHION S.O.R.T TEAM aka my friends (U know yourselves) doesn’t snipe me first…lol


Anyway I digress…right! So my dreams are becoming hazy. I’m beginning to ask myself what the point of all this is. Is this what my life is going to be for the next say 30-40 years? Waking up before God every morning and spending over half a day at a desk? I realized this weekend that I never actually bask in the sun. Forget the fact that I run from the sun like I’m a vampire that’s purely for vanity sake….wrinkles, fine lines, crow’s feet etc. But then I’m at work before the sun comes up and out of there way after it goes down. Before I know it, I’ll look back on my life and I would have spent most of it with my computer and telephone.

I’m beginning to see myself as more of an entrepreneur. In my westernized trad, dropping the kids off at school after making sure they eat breakfast. Home in time to make dinner for my husband (God bless the unlucky bastard lol) I want that freedom to be able to do the things that I WANT to do, WHEN I NEED to do them. Take a vacation without filling out a book worth of paper work only to be turned down by some JACKASS!

I have a new found respect for full time working mothers. I don’t even want to speak to anyone after my 12 hour work day. The thought that I might not be able to talk to my kids about their days and help them with homework or even be home before they get to bed is scary and I know a lot of upwardly mobile women might disagree with me but it’s a matter of preference and choice. I choose for my life to be about my children. I’ve always felt that children don’t belong to us but God makes us custodians of his children. If there’s one thing I intend to give my all in my lifetime, it is my kids. I never thought I’d get to a place where motherhood would mean so much to me considering the fact that kids are like kryptonite to me… they just make me nervous and drain all my energy.

Anyway I am open to business ideas and ready to explore my options.
In the meantime, I’m here on a Saturday afternoon, wondering who in the hell I needed to have slipped a $100 bill or two in heaven to have been born the third Hilton sister!

Friday, February 10, 2006

RUMOR HAS IT...

**I haven't written in such a long time... Happy New Year even though we're 2 months in. I'm back and ready to go. This blog is actually one that I co-wrote with my friend (Low) after seeing the movie "Rumor Has it" with her man about a month ago.
Laziness had me procrastinating putting it up but here it is...Enjoy!**

Picture this.... A man loves a woman and cheats; He expects to be forgiven because even in the moment of infidelity, he never for once doubted he love for his leading lady. Flip the script, a woman loves her man, and then cheats...Ok so what Bungalow in "HELL" would she be residing in. This brings me to the movie "Rumor has it" and the many ways it has been perceived.

I decided to co-authorize this entry with a friend of mine. Saw the movie with her and you can imagine how defensive we were about the issue with the Mr.

MY POINT OF VIEW: The hero=JEFF, the husband-to be. Despite the fact that he had his heart stepped up by Jennifer Aniston's character, He decided to curb his pride and realize that what really mattered was how he felt about her. Sitting in the movie theater with a bunch of Nigerian men only made me realize that it would almost seem impossible for a Nigerian man to forgive a woman who would "dream" of doing such act.
Hero # 2= Jennifer Aniston's Dad, who decided to hear all about his wife's escapades but still took her back because he knew what she had with BB was her quest for adventure and not true love.

A typical man finds out his lady cheats and "bammm" comes the ego. He feels he is being laughed at. His feels his reputation is at stake. He wants to get even. Never for once does he realize that mistakes happen and that the two parties can see past the mistake and move on with their lives from there. Of ten times we are so drowned in elusion that we must keep up to a standard that society would accept i.e. "NO NONSENSE PERSON" We forget to step outside our supposed perfect lives and realize that shit happens but it's the way situations are handled that makes us better pple!

Any man who is able to shelf his ego and face what is at stake (his heart) is a true hero to me. Any man who realizes that "shit happens" and can move on from the situation deserves a standing ovation. As you can see I am not even trying to think about what a girl would go through because case be reversed....WE KNOW HOW TO HOLD OUR OWN!....Majority forgive and move the hell on.(sub-conscious thought, "so if that's wat we (ladies) have to go through, why can't men bend over for us )
To conclude it all. Rumor has it.....................

Miss E's point of view...
As I've always said "real love" only exists in the movies. In 'Rumor Has It...' home-girl Jennifer's been caught red handed kissing on the sexy older man by her fiancé, lover-boy asks "Did you sleep with him?" (Hmm Low this is beginning to sound oh so familiar...lol) and she says YES!!! She then goes on to apologize and he says "Walk out of here with me and marry me rite now and all will be forgotten" and she just stands there and lets him leave because she wasn't sure if that was Mr. Right. Of course she goes back and he says NO and she leaves and then he shows up and takes him in her arms and (all together now) they lived happily ever after. I guess the test audience that the studio got during the test screening wasn't having the 'Nigerian Ending' version. In which case, the movie would have ended where JenJen and 'Sexy older man' were caught kissing because had Jeff been Bayo, it would have been a blood bath up in that b*tch!!

My question is why isn't it possible for a man to forgive a woman's indiscretions? The double standard is so blatant it reeks like a dead rat that died of eating rotten eggs. On getting a man's point of view, Low's MR. was the voice of the male species in this discussion as Himself is on hiatus too busy being a MAN rite now. MR. seems to think that it's ok for a guy to cheat because... get this ladies... he forgets the experience as soon as he's done-Wham Bam Thank you Ma'am! But in our case, he says females are more of a Wham Bam Thank you Ma'am.... How has this changed my life, will I be able to move one? Might this be my true love instead of the he-goat I'm marrying next June? I'm sorry... when did we start to rate cheating according to the degree of afterthought? Doubts or no doubts...don't we all have our weak moments? Infact if men say women are the lesser creatures, should we not be the ones that are more susceptible to cheating? Therefore, should the roles not be reversed? Should our sexual indiscretions not be just as forgivable as our fellow man?

All in all Rumor Has It was a great movie, Shirley Mclaine (I can't even call her the grandmother cos I'm scared she might show up and take a shot at me) stole the show. She was the show.
I'm a firm believer in the fact that the biggest part of love is forgiveness and this movie is the embodiment of that fact. Putting all external elements aside the egos, he said-she said, the angry words and actions, and stripping your self of all the hurt and letting the only thing that counts take over- you, him and LOVE. Like I always say, it brings you together but it's not what keeps you together but those things that do keep you together still come down to one thing and one thing only.... YUP! It all comes down to love.
Miss E over & out!